Sometimes quite is violent
I sing along with those twenty one pilots lyrics almost everyday, without giving them as much as a second thought. It’s only when you truly are in the quiet that you understand the melancholic meaning behind those words.
The air conditioning you hear rumbling, the dog you hear scratching, the clock you hear ticking, but worst of all, the thoughts you hear running throughout your head. A quiet room may be one of the loudest places to be, even more than in front of a jet engine.
What am I doing tomorrow? When is that project due? Worthless worthless worthless! What if everyone just forgets about who I am? I want some waffles. What if I forget who I am? I wander what I’m going to be like In the future. Is that clock slowing down? I can’t take it anymore. Should I dye my hair red like Hayley Williams? If me and Brendon urie got married what would be our ship name? What if I let everyone down? Why do I put in more to friendships than I get out?
All it takes is for me to be in the quiet for a few minutes, and I will most definitely have a pit forming in my stomach from my thoughts.
I think that is one of the reasons that I love music so much. It is a way to get rid of silence, but at the same time it is also a way for me to find refuge from my thoughts.